Bullying in kindergarten might sound surprising, but even at this young age, children can face unkind behaviour that affects their happiness and confidence. In the UK, where Reception year marks the start of formal schooling at age four or five, these early social experiences shape how kids view themselves and others. As parents, carers, or teachers, addressing bullying effectively is key to ensuring a positive start. The Knightsbridge nursery shares some tips on how to spot it, stop it, and support your little one through it.

Understanding Bullying in Kindergarten

At this age, bullying isn’t always the deliberate, malicious act we associate with older kids. It might look like pushing in the playground, name-calling, excluding someone from play, or taking toys repeatedly. Young children are still learning empathy and boundaries, so some behaviour stems from impulse rather than intent. But whether it’s intentional or not, the impact on a child—tears, fear, or reluctance to go to school—needs attention.

1. Watch for the Signs

Kids this young might not say “I’m being bullied,” but their actions can speak volumes. Look out for:

• Coming home upset or quieter than usual.
• Not wanting to go to school or nursery.
• Unexplained bumps, scratches, or torn clothes.
• Changes in eating or sleeping—like nightmares or loss of appetite. If something feels off, gently ask, “How was playtime today?” or “Did anything make you sad?” to open the conversation.

2. Teach Them to Speak Up

Empower your child with simple words to use. Practise phrases like “Stop, I don’t like that” or “Please let me play too.” Role-play at home so they feel ready to stand up for themselves. Let them know it’s brave to tell a teacher or you if someone’s being unkind—reassure them with, “I’ll always listen, and we’ll sort it together.”

3. Partner with the Teacher

Kindergarten teachers are your allies. If you suspect bullying, arrange a quiet chat with them. Share what you’ve noticed—specific incidents or behaviours—and ask about what they see in class or the playground. Most UK schools have anti-bullying policies, even for Reception, so ask how they handle it. A good teacher will keep an eye out and step in with age-appropriate solutions, like group activities to encourage inclusion.

4. Build Their Confidence

Bullied kids often feel small or powerless. Boost their self-esteem with praise—“You’re so good at sharing!”—and fun activities they love, like drawing or building. A confident child is less likely to shrink under unkindness and more likely to bounce back. Arrange playdates with kind friends to reinforce positive social bonds too.

5. Model Kindness at Home

Kids learn by watching. Show them how to treat others with respect—say “please” and “thank you,” share with siblings, and talk about feelings. Read stories like The Rainbow Fish to spark chats about kindness and friendship. When they see empathy in action, they’re less likely to bully and more equipped to handle it if they’re targeted.

6. Address the Bully’s Behaviour (Without Labelling)

If your child is on the receiving end, avoid calling the other child “a bully” in front of them—it can feel overwhelming. Instead, focus on the action: “It’s not nice when someone takes your toy, is it? Let’s tell the teacher so they can help.” If your child is the one being unkind, gently correct them: “We don’t push—let’s use words instead.” Young kids often need guidance, not blame, to change.

7. Encourage Inclusion

Exclusion can sting as much as physical acts. Teach your child to invite others in—“Want to join us?”—and praise them when they do. If they’re left out, suggest they find another friend or activity: “Sometimes people play different games, and Ditto: “You don’t have to be nice to join in—it’s enough that you tried!” Work with the teacher to foster a group-friendly vibe in class.

8. Keep Calm and Stay Positive

Your reaction matters. If you panic or get angry, your child might feel more scared. Stay calm and supportive—“We’ll figure this out together”—to keep their trust. Focus on solutions, not just the problem, so they feel safe and heard.

9. Know When to Escalate

Most kindergarten squabbles sort themselves out with gentle nudges from adults. But if the behaviour persists—say, weeks of targeting your child—or gets physical, don’t hesitate to involve the school formally. Ask for a meeting with the teacher and, if needed, the headteacher. Schools in the UK take safeguarding seriously, and they can step in with plans like extra supervision or chats with the other child’s parents.

A Final Thought

Bullying in kindergarten can feel like a big deal, but it’s often a small bump in a long road of growing up. With your support, your child can come through it stronger, learning resilience and kindness early on. Keep the lines open—listen, guide, and cheer them on. They’re little, but with you by their side, they’re mighty enough to handle anything.